Is your kitty crabby and you’d like to change that? While heredity influences a cat’s personality, you can raise a kitten that’s friendly and social even if you don’t know its early influences and experiences. If you’re looking to help your feline become a lap cat, here are five tips that can help you succeed.

Keep Calm

Sudden movements and aggressive actions scare cats and can make them stay away from you. Instead of sudden movements which might catch your kitten unaware, move slowly so your cat and kitten alike will feel comfortable with you being around. Even if you’ve been living together for some time, your kitten will appreciate some calmness which is at the core of basic feline manners.

Don’t stare

Cats don’t like eye contact and typically feel threatened by it. This is probably the fastest way to earn your kitten’s dislike and make them want to avoid you. Instead, slowly blink your eyes at him and watch for its reactions. The slow-blinking is a non-verbal statement that says “I love you” and if your cat responds with the same slow-blinking, it means your cat loves you. The slow blink is a kitty kiss without all the touchy-feely stuff. And if your cat walks toward you while purring and wriggling around your legs, it’s a sign that you’re getting it right.

Rub him/her the right way

Kittens and cats have the way and places they want to be touched, and when done right, it can help your feline pet become cuddly. The best spots to scratch are between the ears, beneath the chin, and that sweet spot between the eyes. Don’t forget to also stroke them along the spine as it can help you gain some extra points too.  Meanwhile, avoid the belly and base of the tail area as kitties and cats do not like being petted or scratched around those parts. Many cats feel uncomfortable when their tummy is at risk, even if you’re not a threat. The reason is that cats release scents off their odor from their tail glands which they don’t like to pick up from us even though they like to perfume us with glands on their heads and face. Perhaps, the glands at the base of the tail have certain uses for other cats, and their perfume isn’t meant for you.

Bond through grooming

Grooming is another way to gain your cat’s favoritism. Grooming is a social thing among felines as they do it to themselves and each other. Your cat will probably enjoy it if you rub him tenderly and in rhythmic movements while talking to them in a soft voice. Make sure you watch for your cat’s reactions to know if it is enjoying your attention. If you see your kitten’s tail twitching or he stands up and walks away, it’s a sign that it’s enough.

Bribe your feline: Cats do not mind you showing them the love that goes through the belly or stomach tract. Always go around with some cat food stick treats so you can reward your feline whenever he approaches you.


While you’re trying out these tips, keep in mind not to force petting on your kitty.  Research suggests that cats can become more stressed when they reluctantly allow people to stroke them than cats who avoid being petted at all. Perhaps, the most important nugget while training your cat is patience, and remember to observe their reactions to your petting.